Whistle while you work

And if that isn't enough, or if you can't whistle, here is a collection of wax cylinders.
Should it become too much, they may say that you cannot stop the music, a well-aimed mallet blow should fix any such problems.
The Cylinder Preservation and Digitization Project

Official stamp

Finally, managed to find the drated thing again.
I swear someone comes around every night just to hide the stationery.
Of course, it could also be something.

Dubious Research, chapter 1

Ministry of Dubious Affairs

Department of Research

What if? Is one of the key elements in Dubious Research. Many would go as far as calling it Mad Science. Today we concern ourselves with What If Ghosts Were Real.

Most particularly, what if we needed to get rid of them.

Many humans believe in ghosts. Some even hunt them.

Spiritism and Post-Mortem Communication have always been popular, around the world.

Let us assume that those efforts are not in vain, and that ghosts, spirits left behind by dead humans, are real. These may only be a shadow of the beings they once were, but that still means that at some point they were human. Which may mean Trouble.

Belief is a strong force. It is commonly thought, within certain circles, that any “religious” symbol may be used against vampires, as long as the person has real faith, really believes in it.

Sorcery, charms and curses are said to only work if the people involved believe in them.

What if people's beliefs were some form of as-yet untapped energy, only available on a metaphysical plane? Could it take form by interacting with the aether?

Could ghosts be a contruct of spirit, belief and aether?

Let us work on the premise that it is the case. Dubious logic? Well, yes, what else did you expect from us?

If ghosts exist because people believe in them, it is possible that the same applies for other things.

We chose to apply this theory to a way of preventing said ghosts from causing trouble.

Harmful ghosts would most likely carry some negative energy, which one of our trainees keeps referring to as “Bad Vibes”, which would have to be cancelled by a construct of opposite polarity.

A first problem appears as many people naturally believe in ghosts, but only a select few will be aware of the means created to neutralise them. Ghosts can be created out of a far larger belief potential than the counteracting construct, and they also posess their own spirit.

As such, the fight would not be a fair one, and the rules need to be changed.

We suggest nothing less than altering reality around the... ghost grappler.

How to achieve this?

The operator needs to believe that this is possible.

This belief may then be amplified through a specially-designed instrument.

The Reality Modulator

Made of the following parts:

• The Improbability Aggregator: a platypus charm. If such an animal can exist, who knows what can actually be achieved?
• A horseshoe nail
• A butterfly

• Items of dubious actuality:
  • a strand of wool from a Hobbit scarf
  • a ring of chainmail created by Weta Workshop
  • a chip of Police Box blue paint.
  • A fake forged stamp.
    • - A Lexicographic battery: two dictionaries framing the rest of the modulator, for the potential existing in words.

Once we have a chance to tip the scales in our favour, we can move onto the required elements.

Belief

Aether

Spirit.

Belief

There is a lot of belief in the world. It is often linked to religion.
Think of it as a refined form. Raw belief gone through a special filtre.

Sympathetic resonance through the use of the appropriate religious symbols should allow us to tap into this worldwide reserve.

Aether

This is present all around us too, but is even less tangible than belief.

We shall need to draw it out of thin air, then distil it, and store it until it is required.

Spirit

This may be problematic. It would be inconvenient to require the operator to die, and there is no guarantee that they would not turn against you. Spirit needs to be replaced, and this is where positive vibrations need to be involved. 

To Be Continued.

Work in progress

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1st step in a long series.

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Première étape d'une longue série.